I've Seen Miracles Just Happen

After 2 years of no midwifery job (and no job at all most of that time) God has moved mountains to put me back into His service as a midwife. I have been overcome by the many small(and no so) miracles He has done to let me know that this is His calling on my life at this time. These miracles are the evidence I am relying on today as I take steps to obey. My heart is so heavy with the sadness and mourning of packing-going through the rooms of the house and putting the stuff of my life-the memories of my loved ones and happy times shared together-either into boxes marked "take, give away, throw away." So final. Even the "take" boxes don't really contain the essence of what it is I want to have with me. I want my people. But God is telling me that for now I get Him. And He is enough. I KNOW deep down that Romans 8:28 is true and I TRUST that God is good, all the time, even when I don't see what He is doing. I can trust who He is. I just wonder how long the grief will be so intense. Perhaps as I become engrossed in learning my job, my mind will be too occupied to dwell on Ashton and Sadie. But even that thought makes me unbearably sad-I don't WANT to forget them. Love hurts. I remember Staci telling me once that I have to believe that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I don't believe it. I need to know it's true.

Eveybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think its more than you can take
But you are stronger, stronger than you know
Don't you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

It doesn't matter what you've heard
Impossible is in a wor
It's just a reason for someone not to try
Everybody's scared to death
When they decide to take that step
Out on the water
It'll be alright
Life is so much more
Than what your eyes are seeing
You will fine your way
If you keep believing

I've seen dreams that moved the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just hapen
silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

Overcome the odds
You don't have a chance
(That's what faith can do)
When the world says you can't
It'll tell you that you can!

even if you fall sometimes
You will have the strength to rise

--Kutless

Blessed are those whose strength is in Him, who have set their hearts on pilgrimmage, as they pass through the valley of Baca and make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
Psalm 84:5,6

The soverign LORD is my strength;
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to go on the heights
Habakkuk 3:19