A Time to Embrace
Last week was a killer. I worked 48 hours in L&D (24 hours night shift) and 16 in the clinic for a total of 64 INTENSE hours! IT is now Sunday nite and I have totally loved the weekend of rest and renewal, shopping yesterday and spending from 11:00A-3:35PM today at Topsail beach, reading a Karen Kingsbury novel A Time to Embrace. About another mid life couple entering a season of change and coming back together after drifting apart. I think both Jerry and I are approaching this move with hopes that it is part of God's plan to restore joy, love and passion to our own marriage. I know the season of being "single" here for 7 months has given me a desire to have a real life partner to be close to. The times of lonliness have given me a willingness to work on the relationship and it is my prayer that God will work a miracle in our relationship over these next few months as we focus on each other.
Tonight I got groceries and made Mom's Tuna Casserole to take to work for lunches this week. I missed Shayla and Clara's baby shower in Topeka this afternoon. While at the beach today I realized that as beautiful as the ocean is, it isn't really any better than being on Lake Perry in our boat with our kids. But it takes trying it out to see, I guess. Maybe someday we will (semi) retire to a house on a lake and again have fun family times in a boat.
As I told Jerry tonight on the phone, I am really hoping that after he gets here, we can get involved in a church and quickly find a small group to fellowship with. I have been torn splitting my time between work here and family there, not ever really making an effort to have a life outside of work HERE. But now that there will be the 2 of us, we obviously can't go flying back to Kansas every month. No, it is time to be a couple and live our life here while God has us here. My current existence of work and recover from work feels so meaningless. If the job isn't going to be something that is fulfilling, there has to be something else.
As I told him, the job is less than satisfying. I feel neutral about the work I'm doing and have yet to feel that I am really able to make much of a positive difference in the lives of my patients. Certainly, there is no passion for what I'm doing. But it is what God has provided to meet our needs financially probably at least until next Spring, when his pension starts. And I need to put in at least 2 years here to make me "marketable" to any other practice. Last but not least, until the KSBN case is behind me, I can't get any other state licenses besides my Kansas license. So, I think this is probably where we will stay until God finally allows resolution to that case, allowing me to apply and get licenses elsewhere. Or until there are other federal contrqact jobs such as this one, where I can work on my Kansas license, or until a Kansas job opens. I still find it incomprehensible that God would think it best for us to live far away from our grandchildren and not be a part of their lives. I am just having to trust that when the time is right, He will again allow me to find a job that is close to them.
I have been thinking more and more about missions work and how the time might be getting close to right. Again, I need to put in 2 years here, but maybe before we buy a house and while we are still "debt free" God will direct us to a cause we can both pour ourselves into and use the gifts we have each been given. Something to pray about. Reading a good book Love the Life you Live-very thought provoking read.
Staci is at CanIL-Canada Institute of linguistics for 13 hours of summer college courses. Shayla's baby Clara is due July 4 and I'm praying and hoping (but not with much faith) that she will wait for me to get there before she is born. But especially praying that Shay will have enough warning time to get the 1 hour down the road to Topeka before she is born, whether I am there or not. This work I have 5 8h days and the following week, 3 days before I leave to go to Kansas after work June 30. Glad no L&D for awhile. It's been SO busy!
Tonight I got groceries and made Mom's Tuna Casserole to take to work for lunches this week. I missed Shayla and Clara's baby shower in Topeka this afternoon. While at the beach today I realized that as beautiful as the ocean is, it isn't really any better than being on Lake Perry in our boat with our kids. But it takes trying it out to see, I guess. Maybe someday we will (semi) retire to a house on a lake and again have fun family times in a boat.
As I told Jerry tonight on the phone, I am really hoping that after he gets here, we can get involved in a church and quickly find a small group to fellowship with. I have been torn splitting my time between work here and family there, not ever really making an effort to have a life outside of work HERE. But now that there will be the 2 of us, we obviously can't go flying back to Kansas every month. No, it is time to be a couple and live our life here while God has us here. My current existence of work and recover from work feels so meaningless. If the job isn't going to be something that is fulfilling, there has to be something else.
As I told him, the job is less than satisfying. I feel neutral about the work I'm doing and have yet to feel that I am really able to make much of a positive difference in the lives of my patients. Certainly, there is no passion for what I'm doing. But it is what God has provided to meet our needs financially probably at least until next Spring, when his pension starts. And I need to put in at least 2 years here to make me "marketable" to any other practice. Last but not least, until the KSBN case is behind me, I can't get any other state licenses besides my Kansas license. So, I think this is probably where we will stay until God finally allows resolution to that case, allowing me to apply and get licenses elsewhere. Or until there are other federal contrqact jobs such as this one, where I can work on my Kansas license, or until a Kansas job opens. I still find it incomprehensible that God would think it best for us to live far away from our grandchildren and not be a part of their lives. I am just having to trust that when the time is right, He will again allow me to find a job that is close to them.
I have been thinking more and more about missions work and how the time might be getting close to right. Again, I need to put in 2 years here, but maybe before we buy a house and while we are still "debt free" God will direct us to a cause we can both pour ourselves into and use the gifts we have each been given. Something to pray about. Reading a good book Love the Life you Live-very thought provoking read.
Staci is at CanIL-Canada Institute of linguistics for 13 hours of summer college courses. Shayla's baby Clara is due July 4 and I'm praying and hoping (but not with much faith) that she will wait for me to get there before she is born. But especially praying that Shay will have enough warning time to get the 1 hour down the road to Topeka before she is born, whether I am there or not. This work I have 5 8h days and the following week, 3 days before I leave to go to Kansas after work June 30. Glad no L&D for awhile. It's been SO busy!
posted by kirsten | 4:58 PM
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